First with the Inside Story! Plastic
products take over - as new kind of
Santa kicks off twenty first century...
Old Dollmaker Strikes
Back at the Evil Plastic Queen
As Major Store Sacks
Santa Claus !!!
It had just gone midnight when the first flames shot high above the factory roof tops of Pretty Plastics International. For a while, as hundreds of plastic dolls came alive, it looked as if the monstrous Plastic Queen and her scary gray-faced Plastic Patrollers were going to get their way, taking over not only the spirit of Christmas but also the commercial heart of this great city.
But the terrible flames which lit the the night sky like a beacon, in the end seemed to symbolize all that is good about the season of good will. For with the help of some kids and a motley collection of cute little hand-made dolls, known as 'Urchins,' Ruby, an elderly downtown Dollmaker, finally put an end to the evil plans of Cynthetica-Polly-Osmosis - otherwise known as Cynthia - the Plastic Queen.
One of the heroes, a disabled boy by the the name of Vinny, along with a number of his happy but homeless friends, who hang out in in some makeshift huts on the edge of the city dump, was instrumental in causing the massive explosion that ripped the plastic factory apart, destroying forever the Plastic Queens dreams of a plastic glory. It was all quite unbelievable.
Certainly, no one that night could have foreseen the awesome scenes as the doomed Plastic Queen mutated and writhed high above the rising flames.
Nor will anyone ever know just how close we all came to being completely taken over by cheap tacky plastic products. If the youngsters had not realized the fact that one of their close friends, an old tramp by the name of Oddboots, had been kidnapped by the zombie-like Plastic Patrollers, and molded into a plastic Santa, things might have worked out differenty. One thing is for sure: no one could imagine a world without Christmas - or for that matter a world without REAL DOLLS?
For further details of these extraordinary events see inside story by our rambling reporter R.A. Clemcets.
Big city fat cat Samuel 'Sly' De Silva says, "If it's fake it's great.... If it's got that feel - then it's just gotta be real "
The Big Apple was in shock last night when it was reported that Bloomingdales, the city's most famous store, had sacked Santa Claus because his Star Power had faded in the face of plastic products.
"Santa is not something we're doing this year." a spokesman said, coolly. "We're going plastic." Tramps shrieked in horror. "Its a disaster," protested an outraged New Yorker, vowing to switch to rival Macy's. "Santa is a part of Christmas that children enjoy." Then, in what some are calling the Miracle of 59th Street, Bloomies declared, "It's all a big mistake."
VICTIM
But Santa does seem to be falling victim to a trend. It looks as if today's techno-minded kids need more than just an ordinary Santa - they just love live plastic! Especially tacky interactive plastic products at Christmas. Even Macy's is adapting to the new trend. The stores huge 60,000 square foot Christmas Adventure is a hi-tech attraction, with a digitally enhanced plastic Santa, a smart cave, and a interactive snowman inside a plastic forest with 'flaky' fake snow!
Macy's spokesman said "it sure is nice to know that Santa can keep up with the times..."
